Unwanted 3/10
Feb. 19th, 2011 11:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hemrageReturn to Part Two
PART THREE
They arrived at the medical facility bright and early. Jensen had been silent all morning and no efforts to begin a conversation had been fruitful.
The receptionist smiled brightly as Jared approached the main desk. “We have an appointment. Jensen Padalecki to see Doctor Enright.”
Her smile slipped. She cast a quick glance towards Jensen before returning to focus on Jared. Her tone becoming professionally cool. “If you’ll take a seat, I’ll let the doctor know you’re here.”
“Jensen Padalecki?”
The angry words were quiet, but Jared heard them all the same. “That’s who you are now.”
“So, I’ve lost my name as well as my freedom?”
Jared didn’t have a chance to reply as the receptionist returned. She led them into an empty office and handed Jared a sheaf of papers. “Dr Enright will be with you shortly. If you wouldn’t mind filling those in it’ll save time later.”
Jared smiled in response to the smile the receptionist gave him, but they were both equally insincere. Jensen sat, silent and unmoving except for the constant gnawing of his bottom lip, while Jared filled in the paperwork, naming his family doctor and repeating details about his own medical background.
Enright was the accredited breeder physician for the city and the only man who could officially sign Jensen off as Jared’s. He was not Jared’s doctor, but Enright would be in frequent consultation with his – as he would also be Jensen’s - during the course of the following year. Well, assuming he declared Jensen as Jared’s.
He placed the papers back on the desk and waited until the doctor joined them. Jared hadn’t realised exactly how nervous he’d been about this appointment until he was sat there. Not that he had any doubts. Jensen was no longer a virgin, Jared had claimed him sexually and that was the only real criteria that needed to be met today.
But he was still freaked that something untoward might influence the doctor’s judgment – maybe even Jensen himself, assuming Jensen’s opinion and mental state were a consideration. Which, Jared reasoned, they should be – though he doubted they were.
Once Enright arrived, a small but affable man with smiling eyes and a warm handshake, the examination was mercifully quick and clinical. Jensen was checked to make sure that there were signs of intercourse, and once that was confirmed he was no longer needed in the room.
As soon as Jensen was dismissed the doctor looked at Jared as if he was being judged and had been found sorely lacking. The astute doctor queried a few things, his smile disappearing. Jared agreed that yes, Jensen was withdrawn and yes, he was probably also suffering from some kind of depression. Enright didn’t seem either surprised or phased by his answers.
Various forms of advice were provided – even the name of a reputable therapist, if Jared was concerned enough to seek professional help, and prescriptions for various drugs, if he didn’t want the bother. Apparently some mates didn’t.
Jared was reminded that he had to inform the registry as soon as Jensen was confirmed pregnant. And then he was given Jensen’s next appointment.
Twelve months.
That’s how long Jared had. As soon as Jensen was pregnant the clock would be stopped, but this was the official commencement of their probation.
It rarely happened, but Jared knew that if he didn’t succeed in impregnating his mate, Jensen could be reassigned, and there was no way Jared was going to let that happen. Jared Padalecki was not a failure and he would not fail in this.
The agreement stated that they had to have at least 3 children within the first 7 year period. It was recommended that he didn’t have more than 5 within the same timeframe. Once a breeder had had their first child they were notoriously easy to impregnate again, it was only the process of breastfeeding his own children that would delay his body’s receptiveness.
Whenever Jared had envisioned a future with children he’d always imagined a house full of them. As birth control was non-existent it was only abstinence that limited reproduction … and since Jared wasn’t the type of man who could ever see himself being celibate he could well imagine having to move into a large house to accommodate the number of children he and Jensen would bring into the world.
No matter how unwilling Jensen was, Jared could easily see that dream as one he could attain.
One month, that’s how long he’d been living this non-life and now Jared was acting as if they should be celebrating some kind of anniversary. The man was so damned happy and Jensen felt… nothing. He should be wanting to scream - at Jared, at the world, at the fucking wall if there was no-one around to care. But he didn’t. It was so pointless, frustration and despair. It solved nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing.
He’d managed to get used to the routine his life had become, confining himself to the house because he couldn’t bear the idea of bumping into a familiar face, letting someone he knew see what he had been reduced to.
Jared fielded telephone calls from friends and family and Jensen had refused to leave his room if someone came to the house to see him. Luckily the calls from friends became less frequent, but his family refused to be put off. Heaven knows what they thought was happening to him, but he really wasn’t inclined to alleviate their fears. Let them think Jared was some kind of controlling, abusive, monster if that’s what they chose to do. They’d be much better off if they wrote Jensen off as a memory.
So much better off.
As for Jared…
If only Jensen could hate him, but he couldn’t muster enough passion for even that. The man had become infuriatingly caring. Even the sex – because that was always a part of their day, both morning and evening – was less of a trauma. Well, it wasn’t painful. Jared hadn’t been exaggerating when he said he was an experienced and skilled lover, and he had utilised those skills whenever possible. Jensen didn’t dread their couplings any longer, they were an unavoidable part of his life and Jared had sparked something within him. He’d provoked pleasure where Jensen thought there could be none – and he was shamed every time he became aroused, mortified every time Jared brought him to orgasm. And after that first horrific weekend Jared had become determined to get him off every time they fucked.
“Hey, what you doing in there?”
Jensen looked at the water in the tub, only now realising that the water had grown cold while he’d been zoned out. Before Jensen had a chance to respond Jared opened the door and leant against the frame.
“You really don’t want to go out, do you?”
Jensen didn’t answer, realising he was shivering as he pulled out the plug, letting the water flow away. As he stood Jared wrapped him in a towel, rubbing his back. “Jensen, it’s not healthy, being cooped up in the house. We are going out. I’ve put you some clothes out on the bed. Get dressed.”
Jared’s words weren’t harsh, they weren’t demanding, but Jared didn’t have to issue a command for Jensen to acquiesce.
The clothes Jared had selected were warm and comfortable, similar to what Jensen would’ve picked out for himself and Jensen wondered fleetingly how Jared had become so attuned to him.
He’d not even noticed when Jared had started to anticipate his needs, not until days afterwards. Now Jared placed food in front of him before he’d even registered hunger, he’d ushered him towards the bed – to sleep – when he was tired and he’d started withdrawing, giving him space when he sorely needed it or else he’d fall apart.
Gratitude was something he couldn’t feel … it wasn’t on the rapidly dwindling list of emotions in his repertoire. But if it was, maybe he’d feel it for Jared …
PART THREE
They arrived at the medical facility bright and early. Jensen had been silent all morning and no efforts to begin a conversation had been fruitful.
The receptionist smiled brightly as Jared approached the main desk. “We have an appointment. Jensen Padalecki to see Doctor Enright.”
Her smile slipped. She cast a quick glance towards Jensen before returning to focus on Jared. Her tone becoming professionally cool. “If you’ll take a seat, I’ll let the doctor know you’re here.”
“Jensen Padalecki?”
The angry words were quiet, but Jared heard them all the same. “That’s who you are now.”
“So, I’ve lost my name as well as my freedom?”
Jared didn’t have a chance to reply as the receptionist returned. She led them into an empty office and handed Jared a sheaf of papers. “Dr Enright will be with you shortly. If you wouldn’t mind filling those in it’ll save time later.”
Jared smiled in response to the smile the receptionist gave him, but they were both equally insincere. Jensen sat, silent and unmoving except for the constant gnawing of his bottom lip, while Jared filled in the paperwork, naming his family doctor and repeating details about his own medical background.
Enright was the accredited breeder physician for the city and the only man who could officially sign Jensen off as Jared’s. He was not Jared’s doctor, but Enright would be in frequent consultation with his – as he would also be Jensen’s - during the course of the following year. Well, assuming he declared Jensen as Jared’s.
He placed the papers back on the desk and waited until the doctor joined them. Jared hadn’t realised exactly how nervous he’d been about this appointment until he was sat there. Not that he had any doubts. Jensen was no longer a virgin, Jared had claimed him sexually and that was the only real criteria that needed to be met today.
But he was still freaked that something untoward might influence the doctor’s judgment – maybe even Jensen himself, assuming Jensen’s opinion and mental state were a consideration. Which, Jared reasoned, they should be – though he doubted they were.
Once Enright arrived, a small but affable man with smiling eyes and a warm handshake, the examination was mercifully quick and clinical. Jensen was checked to make sure that there were signs of intercourse, and once that was confirmed he was no longer needed in the room.
As soon as Jensen was dismissed the doctor looked at Jared as if he was being judged and had been found sorely lacking. The astute doctor queried a few things, his smile disappearing. Jared agreed that yes, Jensen was withdrawn and yes, he was probably also suffering from some kind of depression. Enright didn’t seem either surprised or phased by his answers.
Various forms of advice were provided – even the name of a reputable therapist, if Jared was concerned enough to seek professional help, and prescriptions for various drugs, if he didn’t want the bother. Apparently some mates didn’t.
Jared was reminded that he had to inform the registry as soon as Jensen was confirmed pregnant. And then he was given Jensen’s next appointment.
Twelve months.
That’s how long Jared had. As soon as Jensen was pregnant the clock would be stopped, but this was the official commencement of their probation.
It rarely happened, but Jared knew that if he didn’t succeed in impregnating his mate, Jensen could be reassigned, and there was no way Jared was going to let that happen. Jared Padalecki was not a failure and he would not fail in this.
The agreement stated that they had to have at least 3 children within the first 7 year period. It was recommended that he didn’t have more than 5 within the same timeframe. Once a breeder had had their first child they were notoriously easy to impregnate again, it was only the process of breastfeeding his own children that would delay his body’s receptiveness.
Whenever Jared had envisioned a future with children he’d always imagined a house full of them. As birth control was non-existent it was only abstinence that limited reproduction … and since Jared wasn’t the type of man who could ever see himself being celibate he could well imagine having to move into a large house to accommodate the number of children he and Jensen would bring into the world.
No matter how unwilling Jensen was, Jared could easily see that dream as one he could attain.
One month, that’s how long he’d been living this non-life and now Jared was acting as if they should be celebrating some kind of anniversary. The man was so damned happy and Jensen felt… nothing. He should be wanting to scream - at Jared, at the world, at the fucking wall if there was no-one around to care. But he didn’t. It was so pointless, frustration and despair. It solved nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing.
He’d managed to get used to the routine his life had become, confining himself to the house because he couldn’t bear the idea of bumping into a familiar face, letting someone he knew see what he had been reduced to.
Jared fielded telephone calls from friends and family and Jensen had refused to leave his room if someone came to the house to see him. Luckily the calls from friends became less frequent, but his family refused to be put off. Heaven knows what they thought was happening to him, but he really wasn’t inclined to alleviate their fears. Let them think Jared was some kind of controlling, abusive, monster if that’s what they chose to do. They’d be much better off if they wrote Jensen off as a memory.
So much better off.
As for Jared…
If only Jensen could hate him, but he couldn’t muster enough passion for even that. The man had become infuriatingly caring. Even the sex – because that was always a part of their day, both morning and evening – was less of a trauma. Well, it wasn’t painful. Jared hadn’t been exaggerating when he said he was an experienced and skilled lover, and he had utilised those skills whenever possible. Jensen didn’t dread their couplings any longer, they were an unavoidable part of his life and Jared had sparked something within him. He’d provoked pleasure where Jensen thought there could be none – and he was shamed every time he became aroused, mortified every time Jared brought him to orgasm. And after that first horrific weekend Jared had become determined to get him off every time they fucked.
“Hey, what you doing in there?”
Jensen looked at the water in the tub, only now realising that the water had grown cold while he’d been zoned out. Before Jensen had a chance to respond Jared opened the door and leant against the frame.
“You really don’t want to go out, do you?”
Jensen didn’t answer, realising he was shivering as he pulled out the plug, letting the water flow away. As he stood Jared wrapped him in a towel, rubbing his back. “Jensen, it’s not healthy, being cooped up in the house. We are going out. I’ve put you some clothes out on the bed. Get dressed.”
Jared’s words weren’t harsh, they weren’t demanding, but Jared didn’t have to issue a command for Jensen to acquiesce.
The clothes Jared had selected were warm and comfortable, similar to what Jensen would’ve picked out for himself and Jensen wondered fleetingly how Jared had become so attuned to him.
He’d not even noticed when Jared had started to anticipate his needs, not until days afterwards. Now Jared placed food in front of him before he’d even registered hunger, he’d ushered him towards the bed – to sleep – when he was tired and he’d started withdrawing, giving him space when he sorely needed it or else he’d fall apart.
Gratitude was something he couldn’t feel … it wasn’t on the rapidly dwindling list of emotions in his repertoire. But if it was, maybe he’d feel it for Jared …
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2011-05-13 03:34 pm (UTC)Jensen for is unexpected status and assignment.
Jared for his longing of companionship, and the distress of his mate.
Not my usual reading but i enjoyed it so far.
Great work.